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Kudakuna Ntibyatuma utubaka urugo Ruhire

Abantu bo bemeza ko Gukuna bituma imibonano mpuzabitsina igenda neza

Mu gihe bamwe mu baturage bavuga ko kudakuna ku mugore bishobora gusenya ingo impuguke zo ziremeza ko gukuna atari ryo shingiro ryo kubaka urugo ngo rukomere.

Gukuna, ibyo benshi bazi nko guca imyeyo, usanga henshi na henshi mu ngo abashakanye batabivugaho rumwe. Hamwe na hamwe, usanga umugabo ashaka umugore yamugeza mu rugo agatangira kumuca inyuma amuhora ko atamushimisha (atamuryohereza). Intandaro yo kudashimisha umugabo ngo yaba ishingiye ahanini ku kuba umugore ataraciye imyeyo nk’uko bamwe mu bagore bubatse babivuga.

Appolinarie Uwiringiyiman, umugore w’imyaka 29 akaba na nyina w’abana bane, yemeza ko umugore utarakunnye adashimisha umugabo mu gihe baba bakora imibonano mpuzabitsina.

Uwiringiyimana avuga ko gukuna byongerera umugore amahirwe yo kunyara kandi aribyo akenshi bishimisha umugabo.

Uyu mubyeyi avuga ko iyo umugabo aguciye inyuma agahura n’undi wakunnye arushaho kumushimisha maze wowe utarabikoze ukaba uribagiranye. Uyu mugore atanga urugero rwa mugenzi we atashatse kuvuga amazina waharitswe n’umugabo babyaranye kabiri bapfuye ko atakunnye.

Uwiringiyimana avuga ko mugenzi we yahoraga atukwa n’umugabo amucyurira ko atakunnye, ndetse ngo binagera aho umugabo amwirukana ngo ajye gushaka uko yakuna abone kumugarukira mu rugo. Uyu mudamu ngo yitabaje Uwiringiyimana amusaba ko yamufasha.

Ati: “Yansabye ko namurangira umuti watuma abasha gukuna mubwira kujya asiga amavuta y’inka ku mishino agakurura”.

Uretse n’uyu mudamu wamwitabaje, Uwiringiyimana avuga ko akunze kwitabazwa n’abandi bakobwa bakuze biganjemo cyane cyane abataravukiye mu Rwanda cyangwa abakuriye mu mijyi bakamubaza uko babigenza ngo bakune.

Uwiringiyimana, ufite abana babiri b’abakobwa muri bane yabyaye, avuga ko igihe cyabo cyo gukuna nikigera atazatinya kubigisha uko babikora nk’uko nawe yabyigishijwe na nyina wamubyaye.

Yaragize ati: ”Turi nko mugikoni twiherereye nzajya mbibereka kuko bifite akamaro”.

Viateur Hitimana, umugabo w’imyaka 41 y’amavuko akaba na se w’abana babiri, we avuga ko umugore utarakunnye aba ameze nk’umwana muto. Ibyo ngo bishobora gutuma umugabo atamurarikira cyangwa ngo yumve afite ubushake bwo gukorana nawe imibonano mpuzabitsina.

Uretse n’ibyo, uyu mugabo avuga ko umugore utarakunnye akenshi adahehera mu gihe cyo gutera urubariro. Kuri we asanga ibi bishobora gukomeretsa umugabo mu gihe bakoze imibonano mpuzabitsina.

Hitimana avugako ataryamanye n’umugore we mbere y’uko amushaka (ibyo bita “avance”.), gusa ngo ntiyari gutinda kumwirukana iyo asanga atarakunnye.

Ati:”Nari nsanzwe mpeheta. Iyo nsanga atameze nk’abandi twahuye mbere nari kumuzingisha agataha iwabo”

Umuco wo gukuna wafatwaga nk’itegeko mu Rwanda rwo hambere. Uyu muhango wakorwaga n’abakobwa b’abangavu bakawukorera mu rubohero babifashijwemo n’abandi bakobwa bakuze kubarusha.

Ancille Nyirabikari,umukecuru w’imyaka 75 y’amavuko avuga ko umukobwa yashoboraga no kwigishwa na nyina cyangwa nyirasenge.Ibi ngo babimwigishaga bagirango bamutegurire kuzarushinga rukomeye, kuko ngo uwabaga atarakunnye yafatwaga nk’icyohe mu muryango ashyingiwemo akaba yakurizamo kutumvikana na nyirabukwe cyangwa baramukazi be bityo akaba yanasendwa.

Uyu mukecuru avuga uko kutumvikana n’umuryango ushyingiwemo byaterwaga n’uko mu gihe cyabo bameraga ko kurongora umukobwa utaraciye imyeyo bitera itubya(igabanuka ry’amatungo n’imyaka) mu muryango yashyingiwemo, ari nacyo cyatumaga bene uwo mugeni bamwita” ikimara kimara abantu n’ibintu.”

Iby’uyu mukecuru kandi byiyongeraho ibyanditswe na bamwe mu banditsi bacukumbuye umuco wohambere mu Rwanda. Mgr Aloys Bigirumwami, mu gitabo yise “Imihango,imigenzo n’imiziririzo mu Rwanda rwa kera”(129p), avuga ko umukobwa wabaga yaraciye imyeyo yitwaga umunyamutima, ndetse ko yabaga anaciye akenge kuko ngo yabaga yaraganiriye n’abandi mu rubohero.

Uyu mwanditsi avuga kandi ko kudakuna byashoboraga gutuma umukobwa atabona umugabo kuko ngo bagenzi be bashoboraga kumusebya hose bakoresheje amazina atandukanye nk’ igipampara,Nyirakirimubusa n’ayandi bitaga abakobwa batakunnye.

N’ubwo aba baturage bemeza ko gukuna ari ikintu cy’ingenzi mu kubaka urugo, bamwe mu basobanukiwe ibyerekeranye n’ubuzima bw’imyororokere bavuga ko gukuna ntacyo byongera mu buryohe bw’imibonano mpuzabitsina.

Emma Claudine, umuhanga mu buzima bw’imyororokere akaba n’umunyamakuru wa Radiyo Salus mu kiganiro kigendanye n’ubuzima bw’imyororokere ”Imenye nawe”, avuga ko ari ukunyara kw’umugore ari no kugira ububobere ntaho bihuriye no gukuna kuko hari benshi mu bagore batakunnye babasha kunyara ndetse hakaba hari n’abakunnye ariko batanyara.

Uyu munyamakuru avuga ko kugira ububobere mu gihe cy’imibonano ubwabyo bitandukanye no kunyara. Ububobere ubwabwo ngo buterwa n’uko umugore yifitemo imisemburo ya kigore ihagije ku buryo ibasha kuvubura ububobere mu gihe cy’imibonano mpuzabitsina. Yongeraho ko iyi misemburo itangana ku bagore bose ndetse hari n’abatayigira; ari nayo mpamvu bamwe bagira ububobere bwinshi abandi bakagira buke ndetse hakaba abatagira na mba.

Kugira ngo umugore anyare mu gihe cyo gushyikirana n’umugabo, Emma Claudine avuga ko agomba kuba afite isoko ivubura amavangingo (azwi nk’ amazi) bita “glande Sk√®nes” mu gifaransa. Iyo soko ngo niyo ishobora kuba ivubukamo amavangingo mu gihe cyo gukora imibonano mpuzabitsina.

Emma avuga ko gufunguka kw’ako kagega ngo biterwa n’uko umugore yishimiye uwo bari kubonana kandi n’umugabo nawe akabasha kumugera ku nyota. Ibyo ngo babikesha kuba babanje gutegurana mbere y’uko bakora imibonano mpuzabitsina. Uretse n’ibyo kandi ngo kunyara bituruka kuri rugongo (clitoris) kandi ngo nta mugore utayigira yaba yarakunnye cyangwa atarakunnye.

Ati:”Ubonanye n’umukobwa atakwiyumvamo ntashobora kunyara n’ubwo yaba yarakunnye akajana”.

Bamwe mu bagabo birukana abagore babo babahora ko batakunnye, Emma akaba asanga ibi bituruka ku myumvire iri mu bagabo bamwe. Umusore akenshi ngo ajya gushaka umugore yarishyizemo ko uwakunnye ariwe w’igitangaza ushobora no kunyara, ibi bikaba bishobora gutuma iyo aramutse asanze atarakunnye ahita yiheba agakeka ko adashobora kunyara bityo ntabe akimunyuze bibaho. Gusa uyu munyamakuru asanga iyi myumvire ishobora no kuba ku bagabo bamwe na bamwe babona gukuna nk’umwanda.

Emma avuga ko nta mugabo wakagombye kwirukana umugore amuziza kuba yarakunnye cyangwa atarakunnye.Buri wese ngo yakagombye korohera mugenzi we bashakanye akamwakira uko Imana yamuremye, kuko ngo abantu badahwanya imiterere y’umubiri.

At: ”Umugore we se ko yemera igitsina cy’umugabo we uko kingana kose ntiyite ku cyo akunda?”

Emma Claudine, umubyeyi w’ abana babiri, umukobwa n’umuhungu, avuga ko adateganya guhatira umwana we gukuna. Gusa ngo azamuganiriza ku bigendanye no gukuna maze yifatire icyemezo ubwe.

Ati: ”Ushobora kumuhatira gukuna akazashakwa n’umugabo utabikunda akakubona nk’uwamushutse; abanjye nzabaganiriza bifatire icyemezo ubwabo bityo ntibazangaye”.

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