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Ikosa Rikunze Gukorwa n'Abari mu Rukundo Bose


Guhoberana, gusomana n’ibindi bikorwa n’abakundana bitandukanye byagakwiye gukorwa hagati y’abakundana mu buryo bwo kwerekana ingufu n’agaciro buri wese aha mugenzi we byo kumwemeza ko amukunda. Ariko mu nyigo nshya yakozwe na kaminuza DePau,l hagaragaramo ko utwo tumenyetso duto duto two kugaragaza urukundo, ubwisanzure kuwo umuntu akunda ngo bishobora kubaho bihishe uburakari bukabije kimwe n’ibindi bibazo bitandukanye.

Ibi ngo bigasobanura ko hari igihe abakundana babikorerana kandi mu by’ukuri bari kubeshyana, iyo rero ibi bikozwe kandi byihishe inyuma y’uburakari bw’umwe mu bakundana, ngo burya ntabwo aba ari urukundo mu by’ukuri rubimukoresheje ahubwo ngo aba abikoreshejwe n’irari ry’umubiri n’akamenyero yahaye umubiri we imbere y’uwo bakundana.

Muri iyi nyigo bakaba barashyizemo ko ngo bagendeye ku bantu bakoreyeho iyi nyigo ngo ibi bikorwa n’abakundana nibura inshuro eshatu mu cyumweru. Ibi ngo bikaba bikorwa cyane n’abantu bakundana bakunda kubonana kenshi ni ukuvuga umwe atuye hafi ya mugenzi we, akaba afite ibibazo bitandukanye by’ubuzima binamuremereye umutima ariko yagera ku mukunzi we akamuhobera akanamusoma amusekera kandi mu mutima we afite ibindi birwaniramo bitamuhaye ibyishimo ariko ibyo akabikorera umukunzi we kugira ngo atamwibazaho kuko aba yarabimumenyereje.

Horan Sean, Porofeseri wungirije muri Kaminuza ya DePaul I Chicago yagize ati : " Abakundana bakoresha ibimenyetso byo kugaragaza urukundo bibeshya imbere y’abakunzi babo, ibi bakabikorera gusa ngo bagaragare neza mu maso yabo, ibi kandi bakabikorera kugira ngo batabura kubikora kandi aribyo bamenyereye abakunzi babo bagatekereza ko bahindutse bakaba babasaba ibisobanuro kandi bumva badashaka kubabwira ko hari ikitagenda mu buzima, abakunzi babo bakabakuraho icyizere bababwira ko gato katagenda mu buzima kazajya gahungabanya urukundo rwabo.”

Ngo si ibi gusa bikorwa n’abakundana kandi babeshyana, kuko muri iyi nyigo batanze n’izindi ngero zitandukanye harimo ngo nk’umuhungu ubonana n’umukunzi we akamuhobera akanamukorakora kandi abyihingamo bitamurimo,cyangwa ugasanga umuhungu abwiye umukobwa bakundana ati : “Ndagukunda” kuri telefone mu gihe bari bari kuvugana kugira ngo abone uko amukupa vuba bataganira byinshi isaha yo kujya kureba umukino wa umupira ikamurengaho. Undi we ngo yabwiye umukunzi we ko afite imisatsi myiza kugira ngo atumva ko ari mibi akamusaba amafaranga yo gukoresha indi.

Nubwo rero ngo ikinyoma mu rukundo ari kibi, ariko ngo hari n’igihe kigera kikaba ngombwa kuko gishyirwa mu rwego rw’ibirungo by’urukundo cyangwa hari igihe abakundana babeshyana kugira ngo bakomeze urwo rukundo barimo, nk’uko iyi nyigo ibivuga.

Mu mwanzuro y’iyi nyigo, bakomeza bavuga ko mu buzima bwa buri munsi bw’abakundana, nta mpamvu yo kureka gukorera umukunzi wawe ibyo mwamenyeranyeho ngo mube mwanabipfa kubera utuntu duto duto tutagenda kuko ngo utwo tuzahoraho mu buzima. Bakomeza bavuga ko kwinjira mu rukundo bisaba kwiyemeza no kudakaza imbaraga nyinshi kugira ngo umuntu abashe kurubamo neza.

Ariko kandi nabwo ngo kubera ko abakundana icyabagiraho ingaruka ku rukundo rwabo batagihishanya, ngo umwe nabona mugenzi we atameze neza ntagategereze ko ibyo amukorera n’uko abikora ameze neza azabimukorera kimwe n’igihe atameze neza, aha ngo habaho gushyira mu gaciro ku mpande zombi.

Kubiganiraho ngo niyo nzira iboneye ifasha ubuzima bw’abakundana cyangwa se n’abashakanye.

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